" I was lonely. I had a few friends but I was lonely", said a popular TV presenter, whose life seemed so perfectly under control.
You could have a long list of people all around you, gathered all through the years, but still experience a deep pervasive loneliness that can be felt even when surrounded by other people. It goes beyond being physically removed from people, instead it is an emotional state of feeling apart from others. Being surrounded by friends and even a lover can still leave one feeling disconnected
As such, loneliness is a complex and usually unpleasant response to isolation that includes an anxious feeling about lack of connection or communication with other beings, both in the present and extending to the future.
There are so many causes of loneliness ranging from divorce to facing retirement, death of someone significant, lack of the required friendship that one needs, lack of social support, feeling invisible and believing no one around understands you, being unable to fit in, heartbreak and so on.
Loneliness can even happen when you have so many social contacts, as feeling alone or empty relates to the quality of relationships and not the quantity.
"Do I spend enough time with my friends? Do they really see me or know me?" "What friend can I plan to visit or invite for an afternoon of true sharing?" "I have a lot of friends, yet I have problems communicating and sharing anything with them" "I am lonely because I don't have that close special someone in my life" "I feel no connection in my marriage" " My siblings don't understand me, so we don't really talk much" " Being constantly judged in my relationship, has affected my self-esteem, I feel invisible"
Loneliness has negative physical and emotional effects and can lead to complex health issues like depression, risk of a heart disease, weak immune system, disrupted sleep patterns, low self-esteem to mention a few. What are you doing to relieve it? Are you amplifying it through sad passivity by involving in behaviours that makes the situation worse such as sleeping, sitting at home and watching TV, taking tranquilizers to make you forget it all (alcohol and the likes), sitting and thinking and doing about about it, feeling powerless to change the situation.
Take charge of your life by taking one step at a time. Find a new hobby,go out more, pick up exercising, find something useful to do with your time, something that would make you a better person, talk to someone!
Are You Lonely? Ask Yourself
